- Your audience is unlikely to remember anything more complicated
- You are unlikely remember anything more complicated and will foul up your speech or lose your thread
- Errmm.. Can't remember the third, but I'm sure it was a good one.
Anyway, one is always on the look-out for conflations of three related incidents of a given topic. Rather like buses.
Today, it is the bizarre, if not profoundly disconcerting, mixture of animals and - curse this modern lexicon - sexuality.
Thus, we have:
- This, which purports to divine the secrets of the mind from the manner in which you choose to draw a pig. Nothing that a few cruel years at any minor public school couldn't sort out;
- This frankly extraordinary story, which rehearses the inevitable outcome of a clash between the madness of the Thames Valley Police on the one hand and irreverent student behaviour on the other. Mind you, what can one expect from that collection of losers and airheads that is the alumni of Balliol College?
- This. I'm not quite sure what kind of animal this is, but clearly it is not human.
Michael Jackson's lawyer said today that the singer will no longer share his bed with young boys.