Monday, September 26, 2005

Two things you need to know about.....

Your bookish and learned Pedant-General is always delighted to be able to add to his store of important knowledge.

This weekend's entertainment found him engaged in the most enlightening conversation with a nice gentleman from the Game Conservancy Trust.

What did he have to tell us? The two things that we all need to know about Grouse Poo. Obviously.

They are:
  1. Grouse poo is green when freshly laid (dropped?), but changes to Orange over time, as the grass component dries out. Interestingly, in this state they look remarkably like Wotsits.
  2. Grouse produce exactly one pellet of poo every 20 minutes.
Armed with this knowledge and coming across a little grouse refuge containing, say, 6 pellets of poo, one is able to discern whether one is looking at the resting place of 1 grouse, who idled away 2 hours thinking about whatever it is that grouse think about, or perhaps a brace, engaged in conversation (or something else) for a hour, or indeed whether there had been a veritable party, but for only 40 minutes.

Gripping stuff, eh?

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